List of Wapsi Square Characters

This List of Wapsi Square Characters is derived from the 12 years of the comic, but much of it is based on the work of fan Joseph Houk, which can be found posted at Scribd.

There is a different list, overlapping this one, over on TV Tropes: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Characters/WapsiSquare - but remember, "TV Tropes will ruin your life," or at least eat your evening.

Characters

 * Abuela - Spanish word for "grandmother", used by Monica to refer to both her unnamed grandmother (who lives in Monterrey, Mexico with the rest of Monica's family - and makes a great mole) and her also-unnamed great grandmother. Her great-grandmother supposedly lived in their guest house, and taught Monica glyph reading. After asking her parents why no one went to visit her in the guest house, she found out she'd been dead for over a dozen years. Monica later found out that it was actually Mayahuel, Jin's mother, appearing as her abuela, who taught her glyph language.
 * Alan - Kevin's friend. Helped Kevin break the ice with Monica one day in the park, though he got chased by Dietzel for his troubles. Comes off as a bit of a philosopher when it comes to life and love, though he came off as a bit of a lothario early on. Has pretty much cemented his relationship with Jin as of late, convincing her that she's "stuck with him." Helped Jin get through her "suicide attempt", but couldn't stop her from blasting a hole in the wall of the Cerebrus Club. Jin has apparently clued him in on her situation, and he doesn't seem to mind.
 * Albrecht, Ellen - Owen's sister. Never seen, only mentioned in Owen's biography.
 * Albrecht, Owen - Short guy, and Shelly's musician friend. Once, Shelly's main and completely unknowing love interest. Now together with Lakshimi Prasad. Lives over a bar in the Twin Cities. Guitarist for the band Fermented Banana; name for the band came from a discomfiture that Monica experienced one morning. Instead of brushing her teeth with toothpaste, she did so with a Fermented Banana. He and Lakshimi haven't been seen in the strip for quite some time. Was once considered a primary cast member.
 * Anger - One of Monica's personal demons. Made a single appearance in the strip when the Golems had a "silly string" party (the "Personal Demons" storyline); has a shattered face and appeared to carry a razor blade. Has not appeared since.
 * Atsali - A teenage siren who met Katherine in the Bibliothiki one day; one thing led to another and they had much more of an adventure than either had expected. She's also Castela's adoptive sister.
 * Bia - A titan, the daughter of Pallas and Styx, one of a very few titans on Earth. She's old enough to have witnessed the Chimera Apocalypse first hand, she's an old associate of Charon, and she's a mother. If you ask Phix, she's also an uncaring bitch - Phix has her reasons. She may work as muscle for Zeus, and "Bia" means 'violence' or 'force'  in Greek.
 * Becky - The first server at Mucho Mocha, who brushed off Monica's simple request for a cup of coffee. Went unnamed for years until her name was recently revealed by Pablo. Last appeared right before Monica went to Mexico on vacation in 2002.
 * Bikers at Sally's - When Monica's car broke down in the warehouse district she met several nice bikers at a bar called Sally's.  They were amazed to find out that Monica's grandfather was "THE" Aaron Sullivan. The group gave her a ride home after her car conked out leaving a contributor's party at the museum.  Specific bikers are Ben (a plastic surgeon), Earl (an architect), Lenny(the head chef at Palladio's restaurant), and Pete (an anesthesiologist).
 * Bjarni - An old Viking who fell on ice and was derided for this by a female Viking observer who goes unnamed in a flashback comic. Has nothing else to do with anything in this strip. Move along, now.
 * Bontemps, Jacquline "Jacqui" - Shelly's musician friend and freckled yoga studio owner. Lead singer and founder of the band Fermented Banana. Her studio, named Punk Yoga, was started with the money she got from her parents' trust fund. Has been put in a precarious position between her secretary and her good friend Shelly, as Shelly has become a personal trainer at her studio.
 * Budur, Acacia "Bud" - A young and innocent girl, until she was made part of the Chimera. One of the three Golem Girls; now an individual again - but still incredibly powerful. Remains young and innocent as long as she is able to keep the horrible memories away. Now employed as a dance instructor at a dance studio in Minneapolis. She transforms into a huge goat-like creature as part of the Chimera, and has a "storage door" in her torso. She has hinted that she is from the Mediterranean area (and apparently has an accent from that area).
 * Castela - First appeared as a friend of Atsali's in the orphanage; she's a young girl named after a kind of thorny shrub. She and Atsali are now with Katherine and living happily ever after.
 * Charon - In Greek mythology, the ferryman across the river Styx. In Wapsi Square, a skeletal figure involved with death...and also Tsillah's father. He knew Bia back in 12,000BC.
 * Chimera - A creation of a long-dead civilization (assumed to be the people of Lanthis), which was inadvertently wiped out as a result of its loss of control. Made up of two young girls (Acacia and Brandi) and a demi-goddess (Jin/Tochtli); the "recipe" for its creation was originated by Jin's mother (aka Mayahuel). Represented as a combination of a lioness, a goat and a snake; is only seen in one strip as something appearing to be a bat-like creature. A later civilization (theoretically the Maya) managed to separate the three parts of the creature, and made Tepoz their "keeper". They were used as "guardians" by the Maya of the pyramids at Teotihuacan.WapsiSquare2009-11-03f2_puts_up_with_you_how.JPG
 * Creepy Girl - Shelly's demon. Somehow, in becoming a "doorway" for the demon world, Shelly's demons all coalesced into one single demon, which looks surprisingly like Shelly did when she was a little girl. First came up when Shelly was "dating" Heather, but was never pegged as a demon until recently.
 * Curly - Guitar shop guy. Goes to Shelly's shop for his car repairs. Never actually seen, though Shelly is talking to him in the strip where she meets Heather.
 * Dance Class Lady - One of the older women in Bud's dance class at a studio in Minneapolis; commented to her how her classes made her "feel like a kid again".
 * Dietzel - Monica's just-a-dog bull terrier. For once, a dog in the comics that does not speak or save the world on a regular basis. He has shown some erratic intelligence, but mostly only acts human-like when it suits the plot or makes for a good joke. In other words, he's more a comic foil than anything. Doesn't like sticking his head out the window of Monica's car after a nasty incident with a June bug when he was a puppy. Dietzel was the second sculpture for sale at the Patch Together website.
 * Doubt - One of Monica's personal demons, the most powerful of them all. Monica tried running from her at age 14, and was nearly run over by a bus because of it. Jin kept her from being hit, but her heart stopped briefly as a result. Speaks in "mirror" language when empowered (sometimes leading her to be named "acinoM" in that state); her appearance changes as well. The first time she appeared, Monica wrestled with her openly in front of Tepoz, and sent it running. Recently reappeared, stronger than ever, along with Vanity, Panic and Lust; she has pointed out to Monica that despite what she may believe, she's not always her enemy. Has had interactions with the Golem Girls (who initially thought she was a "pet"); not quite sure if Doubt is a "generic" demon, since it wrestled a bit with Jin over her past. Monica stated she "can be the most seductive" of her demons. And she really, really, really likes pizza.WapsiSquare_dylan_dietzel.jpg
 * Dylan - Delivery girl for Papa's Pizza, aka "The Pizza Bimbo," and for all we know she's the only pizza delivery person in Wapsi Square. Apparently she delivered pizza to Dietzel every day while Monica was visiting her family in Mexico; Dietzel still orders pizza from there, as Monica told him to "remind her to take her shoes off". How a dog who can't talk and has no fingers accomplishes all of this we don't know. She also delivers to Tina. She's blonde, wears a baseball cap and headphones, and drives what appears to be an VW Rabbit. Her name was revealed by Pablo after a sketch of her trying to convince Dietzel to eat a pizza was put on eBay.
 * Ehrlich, Amanda - Photographer and Monica's school friend. Was the first character in the strip, along with Monica. Recently returned to the strip, after getting a spit-take bath from Monica after asking her about "old texts, mythical beasts, riddles and calendar machines". She was recently "adopted" by a stray male kitten that she named Selenium.
 * Euryale - a gorgon that Monica met in the Bilbliothiki. She's Southern, improbably perky, and says her day job is as a marine biologist.
 * Evil Wizard - The leader of the priests of Lanthis who were keen on trying to create the Chimera using a formula provided by Jin's mother, Mayahuel. He was very impressed upon his first meeting with her. (Oops, did I give something away?)
 * Farmer, Egyptian - Unnamed individual that popped out of Bud's "stomach door", looking for Tepoz (who apparently owed him a bunch of tomatoes). Later revealed that he owns the other tapestry, which he displays in his market in Egypt (which may have been a prevarication on the part of Tepoz). Unfortunately, when Monica went in search of the other tapesty, she found he wasn't exactly in one piece.
 * Fear - One of Monica's personal demons. Was only seen in one panel, with empty, hollow eyes. Has not appeared since the "Personal Demons" storyline. Not to be confused with Panic (see below).
 * Fields, Gregory - Monica's boss at the University Historical Museum. Likes to give Monica assignments and run the other way. Regardless of this, he thinks highly of her. His name was discovered only recently when he walked in on Monica talking with a humanized Phix; he likes Phix, too.
 * Firefighters - Amanda and her assistant Jason went to Key West to photograph some female firefighters for a calendar (at the same time Monica was in Mexico and Fermented Banana was playing in Des Moines); there she met Claire, Debra, Julia, and Nikki. She got a great action shot of Debra with a shark.
 * Gilchrist, Katherine - Museum curator and spider collector (though she is afraid of them). Social disaster with a doctorate in fiber studies. Likes Starbuck from the new Battlestar Galactica, as was shown by her Halloween costume. Had some half-dead plants that she wanted to have "more of a social life" than her - until squirrels ate them. Katherine then ate the squirrels - "taste like chicken" was her comment. Big fan of the local plant conservatory. Caught the eye of a cute guy when his volleyball accidentally hit the bowl of her pet fish Oscar. Monica has recently (and reluctantly) let her in on some of the secrets of the Calendar Machine and the long-distance-travel tapestries. A primary cast member.
 * Golem Girls - The golem girls are Jin, Brandi, and Bud; see also "Chimera".
 * Guards, Lanthian - The two heavies that tried to attack Mayahuel (Jin's mother) in the flashback scene that begins the third Wapsi Square book. Mayahuel showed the one guard her "look ma, no hands!" slicing technique - which impressed the Evil Wizard to no end.
 * Guzmán, Tina Rosario Aldaco - Barista who makes the best damn coffee in the Twin Cities at her shop, Mucho Mocha. After that, it gets complicated: she was the driver who was involved in the accident when Monica ran in front of a bus to avoid Self Doubt; her "soul" apparently died and her personal demons took over her shell. The "conglomerate" decided to open a coffee shop in the Twin Cities, providing wisdom to others despite having no recollection of who she was prior to the accident - save for a few newspaper clippings that suggest she was the daughter of a drug lord and was on the run from him. Possesses a special clock with a key that looks a lot like one of Shelly's clay dolls; Brandi happened to notice recently that it contains some sort of stiletto knife. She also has a set of notebooks in some sort of shorthand that spooked Monica when she told her about them. Her demons are apparently visible to others who are similarly "undead", like Bud (to everyone else, she just has really strange-looking eyes). A primary cast member.
 * Hatred - One of Monica's personal demons. Very dark, almost a negative image of Monica, with a grill-like mouth and hollow, "glowing" eyes. Only appeared in the "Personal Demons" storyline.
 * Jacob - A "cute coffee shop boy" Atsali had a crush on. He and his sister Randi work at a Minneapolis coffee shop that's apparently not Mucho Mocha. The results of having a siren and a satyr hang out together have not yet been explored.
 * Janet - Co-worker of Monica's at the University Museum. First mentioned in the first full year of the strip, she was only referred to by name. Much later, Monica once mistook her for Doubt. Janet may have been Monica's best friend in one of the previous "cycles" of history reset by the Calendar Machine.
 * Jason - Amanda's personal assistant, a nerdy sort who was intimidated by the firefighter models at the beachfront photo shoot.
 * Jason Goodnow - briefly Monica's boyfriend when she was sixteen who broke up with her on account of being a dumb kid. Presumably no relation to the photographer Jason.
 * Jin (aka Tochtli) - The Timekeeper's Daughter. Previously a part of the Chimera; her actions may have been the reason why the creators lost control of the being - and nearly destroyed the world in the process. Jin is the snake creature in the chimera, and has snake-like eyes that flash at times. As Tochtli, she is represented as a black rabbit. Jin's mother was the one who taught Monica the Glyph language. She stated in a flashback to the accident that her mother trusted Monica with her words, as a way of keeping her mother "alive". A primary cast member.
 * Joanne - Owner-operator of Joanne's Elite dance studio in Minneapolis. She hired Bud as one of her dance instructors at the end of 2006. Sometimes questions Bud's sanity.
 * Joe - The pretend street-robber and psychologist. He tried robbing Heather (twice) and Shelly once. Unfortunately for him, Heather was packing some serious heat the first time - and Shelly was ticked off the second time.
 * Justin - Also known as Epimethius the Titan, and "Officer Tight Buns" (usually not to his face, although maybe to his other side). He's a Minneapolis police officer now; the legend of Epimethius goes back much farther. He's met both Bud and Shelly in the line of duty - which the two of them didn't know beforehand.
 * Kevin - Monica's paramour. Freelance photographer from the Twin Cities. Until a recent case of drunken "poiting" (teleportation) on Monica's part, he's been kept in the dark about all the supernatural stuff going on. Took the revelation of all the crazy stuff in Monica's life in stride. He was a bit angst-ridden over Monica's apparent sexual overdrive in response to her issues with things supernatural. Alan, upon hearing his concerns, didn't see the problem.
 * Kittie - Tina's cat, with a somewhat unoriginal name. Of course, for most cats, that's no problem, because how many of them actually come when you call them?
 * Kramer, Doctor (no first name given) - The doctor who dealt with Shelly's bowling-ball incident; Shelly was knocked unconscious while simultaneously talking to Heather and trying to clean out her closet. Nearly got hit by a bedpan when Shelly found out she'd have to stay at the hospital overnight.
 * Kukulcan - Aztec god and Tepoztecal's mentor. Rough equivalent of Zeus/God Almighty. Has interesting taste in clothing. Stated to Tepoz that Monica was "trained" to be a glyph reader for a reason; apparently Jin and her mother had something to do with this.
 * WapsiSquare2005-07-29_(Punk_Yoga_ad).jpg - Jacqui's receptionist at Punk Yoga. Formal, a bit odd, shy, and richly tattooed. Called her poster appearance "dork cheesecake." Doesn't like Shelly very much. Shelly doesn't care much for her, either, referring to her as "that little insect." The two have an adversarial relationship over access to Jacqui. Was recently revealed that she was in juvie detention hall growing up.
 * Lust - One of Monica's personal demons. Her appearance is similar to Doubt, but instead has "made-up" lips and wears a camisole top. Doesn't stand upright (since she's a more "primal" demon). She recently "overpowered" Monica with desire to become rich from discovering the Calendar Machine. Tends to work in tandem with Vanity (see below).
 * Lydia - Custom bra constructor. Holds a degree in architecture. Very spooky voice. Made only one appearance in the strip.
 * Marta - Monica's cousin, living in Monterrey, Mexico with the rest of Monica's family. Taller than Monica; she is planning to go to law school and become a lawyer.
 * Mayahuel - Jin's mom and "The Timekeeper". The unseen person behind all the machinations of the Calendar Machine, and the person who developed the process to make golems. A Glyph reader, she created Tepoztecal, possibly from a rat or weasel - which explains a lot. She was trapped in the spirit realm and returned to the physical world by Bud when the Calendar Machine was dealt with.
 * McBride, Suzy - Vampire FBI agent recently promoted to the MIB. Impetuous, writes her own rules; loose cannon with a heart of gold. Partner of Lily Pratt.
 * Meadows - One of the people who runs Atsali's old orphanage; the strip hasn't said much of Mr Meadows.
 * Mercenaries, Egyptian - The group of soldiers that suddenly opened fire on Monica when she grabbed the other tapestry that was supposedly in the Egyptian "fruit market".
 * Mike - Security guard at the Minneapolis museum. He is in charge of the storage vaults at the museum, where Monica had the long-distance-travel tapestry placed.
 * Mills, Heather - Shelly's lesbian friend, and possible "love interest" from the recent past. Radio station manager, and lead singer of Intentional Thumbprint, the band that opened for Fermented Banana at The Plow in Des Moines; she's now in the twin cities. Is an avid shooter and is licensed to carry a gun[]. Had a nice little "date" with Vickie Talbot over wine, which led to a relationship.
 * Nudge - Introduced as one of Tina's voices, she's now in the Bibliothiki with Phix.
 * Oduya, Brandilyn (Brandi) - One of the three Golems that Tepoz caused to appear as drunken college girls to Monica. Previously part of the Chimera (a very powerful being that nearly destroyed the world) with Bud and Jin; she can transform into a lioness when angered or attacked. Adult, emotionally solid as a rock, and a mother hen. A primary cast member.
 * Oscar - Katherine's pet betta fish. She talks to it like it actually understands her - which isn't too far fetched in the Wapsiverse.
 * Pallas - Bia's father, a titan; no appearances to date.
 * Panic - One of Monica's personal demons. Recently showed back up, having gained some power as Monica lost the book she checked out of Phix's Bibliothiki (library). Represented by a head with multiple horns - almost like a Medusa - and a large toothy mouth; doesn't say much. Monica stated that "she can surprise me" at times.
 * Phix - Sphinx librarian of the Bibliothiki a supernatural library with multiple doors to this and other worlds. She has taken Monica under her wing (literally); early on she gave her a book, "Machine After the Sun Stone", which Monica believed contained many of the answers to the questions in her life - though it was actually written by Jin. She has enlightened Monica on some aspects of her past, relationship with Jin, and current post-human status.
 * Prasad, Jaheel - Lakshmi's teenage sister. Lived with Lakshmi until recently (assuming she moved off to college later). She threatened to kick Owen's butt if he treated Lakshmi badly.
 * Lakshmi.jpgd, Lakshmi - Construction worker. Even more physically imposing than Shelly. Now together with Owen. Tries to be soft and sweet. Likes swing music (to Owen's dismay). Biography states she is an Olympic swimmer and works for her father's construction business. Hasn't been seen in the strip for ages.
 * Prasad, Makshi - Lakshimi's other (younger) sister. Seen briefly (it's assumed) when Owen called her after their first date.
 * Pratt, Lily - Vampire FBI agent recently promoted to the MIB. Practical, no-nonsense, cautious and by-the-book. Partner of Suzy McBride.
 * Randi - The sister of Jacob the "cute coffee shop boy." The two work at a Minneapolis coffee shop that's apparently not Mucho Mocha. It's not been shown to the readers but apparently she's more comfortable being a satyr than her brother.
 * Rigo - Monica's other cousin. Very machismo. Doesn't care much for his friends' tactics in wooing girls - like his cousin and sister.
 * Roy - Either a friend or relative of Monica's from Peru. He shipped her a voodoo doll that looked like Shelly in the second strip. Has not been referred to since.
 * "Sailor" - Nickname given by Monica to a 19-year old boy that she almost hooked up with at a wedding that Amanda was photographing, with Monica acting as her assistant. The wedding was the first time Monica used the Glyph language out loud in the strip.
 * Salesman, Bowling Shop - The gentleman who sold Brandi not one but two bowling balls. Not that Brandi intended to buy more than one, of course.
 * Secretary, Unnamed - The receptionist for Lydia, the custom bra-maker for Monica. Most prominent feature is large roundish glasses.
 * Selenium - Amanda's strange-eyed kitten. He woke her up one night and wandered into her life and "adopted" her. Talent is apparently to make a mess by drooling and peeing over everything, and his Wolverine-like claws. Like it or not, he's got the run of Amanda's studio, and she's now a reluctant cat owner. "Selenium" name comes from the element used in tintype photography for its conduction of electricity.
 * Simone - Bar waitress at Darren's bar. She was tending bar while Darren was dog-sitting Dietzel (and Monica was down in Mexico). She was also the recipient of a sloppy lick on the face from Dietzel a bit earlier when he decided to play "spin the bottle" with the patrons of Darren's bar. Looks a lot like Brandi, but we're pretty sure she's not one and the same; she was introduced before the Golem Girls came on the scene.
 * Smooze, Marcus P. - The muscled lawyer and ambulance chaser with whom Bud flirted briefly. Name only appeared on the card that he handed to Bud after her header into the sidewalk.
 * Stinky - a giant squid thing apparently a friend or pet of Bud and Brandi from long ago. He's long lived and apparently understands English; it's unclear how smart he is. He was the one who brought the wrecked U-296 to Bud, with a Vimana Cell inside.
 * Styx - Bia's mother, a titan; no appearances to date.
 * Sullivan, Aaron - Monica's maternal grandfather, the WWII biker soldier. First mentioned in reference by the patrons of Sally's Bar; supposedly he once rode through a German camp on his Harley Liberator - without them firing a shot. Monica has since realized that he had a relationship with Jin prior to his meeting her grandma - and may have known something about the Calendar Machine.
 * Sundahl, Georgette - Skinny model with very high metabolism - and very intelligent. Goes by her first name (Georgette); last name is assumed to be the same as her sister. Monica was involved in advertisements for her restaurant chain, based on a pub in Minneapolis. Absent from the strip for a long period but reappeared later.
 * Sundahl, Jill - Georgette's sister and a superb cook; looks like she could kick Lakshimi's butt. Monica ran into her at the "elf house" on Lake Harriet in Minneapolis, where Jill first mistook her for one of Georgette's "modeling friends".
 * Sunglasses Girl - The kinky girl that Alan was seen in bed with. Amazing with a rubber chicken and a toilet seat. Only seen in three separate strips, around the time when Kevin first asked Monica out.
 * Talbot, Vickie - The lesbian suit girl Heather met in Tina's cafe; she may be a regular at Mucho Mocha. Heather got up the nerve to call her and the two went out to a wine bar together. Heather unintentionally propositioned her at the bar; readers didn't see if it was consummated, but Heather had a very happy look on her face the next morning at Tina's. When last seen they were still together.
 * Tepoztecal (aka Tepoz) - The Aztec god of alcohol. Guardian of both the Golems and, to a certain extent, Monica. Hardly a supernatural heavyweight, but knows more than he lets on. Basically a good guy - if a bit short and on the blue side. Was held captive in a statue, until Monica unknowingly freed him by reading the incantation on the outside. Likes to watch the Weather Channel. Can be seen by Katherine, who helped Monica interrogate him about the disappearance of the tapestry. Apparently was a creation of Jin's mom as a "test run" for making golems. A primary cast member.
 * Terán, "Yummy Tea" - Mural artist. Went to school with Monica, where they met in the fourth grade. She nicknamed him "Cazuela" (a big-handled cooking pot, which is what Yummy Tea looks like). His "artist name" is apparently something he got from a girlfriend, and isn't printable in a family magazine. One of his murals featured a caricature of Tepoz, to Monica's surprise.
 * Thymbris - Mother of Tsillah; first met by Atsali and Nadette in the Bibliothiki. Tsillah's peculiar personality quirks seem to run in the family.
 * Tia - Spanish word for "aunt", used by Monica to refer to her unnamed aunt. Lives in Monterrey, Mexico with the rest of Monica's family.
 * Tio - Spanish word for "uncle". Used by Monica to refer to her unnamed uncle, a successful tile and brickwork specialist in Monterrey, Mexico.
 * Tsillah - The daughter of Charon (Death) and Thymbris; first seen in the library by Shelly and Justin; currently assigned to Monica as a liaison, and functioning as a dotted-line supervisor for Lily Pratt and Suzy McBride, two vampires now assigned to "Men in Black."
 * Vanity - One of Monica's demons; represented by an interesting combination of an empty bustier and fishnet stockings with nothing but a china doll face on a backbone. Has apparently grown powerful in recent days as Monica has learned more about her past and about the Golem Girls. Works in tandem with Lust (see above).
 * Villarreal, Monica - The main character of Wapsi Square. Very intelligent if a tiny bit socially inept. Twenty-something museum curator, magic glyph reader, golem keeper, and the bearer of a truly magnificent pair of, uh, you know. Listed at 4'11" in height with reddish-brown hair. Was originally a part-owner of an antique store with Amanda. Has a soft spot for antiques, coffee, '80's music, and hi-fi stereos. Died briefly as a teenager when she was nearly hit by a bus running away from her Self Doubt, but was "saved" by Jin. Lives in a little house with her dog, Dietzel, in the Wapsi Square area of the Twin Cities. She has developed the ability to "poit" (teleport) from place to place, assumably in relation to her glyph-reading ability and her visits to the Biblothiki. She doesn't quite have it down, though. She was the first Wapsi Square sculpture for sale through the Patch Together website, in her trademark Magic 8-Ball T-Shirt.
 * Volleyball Guy - Katherine's accidental "date" after her beach escapade. He lost his concentration on the game of volleyball when he saw her stride into the lake, and the ball bounced off his head - and onto Oscar's fishbowl! He managed to screw up his courage to ask her out after apologizing. Haven't heard from him since then.
 * Wahnee, "Brother" - Shelly's oldest, unnamed brother. The only thing we know about him is that he went to school with the lead singer of the Pickledippers, Monica's favorite punk rock band. Shelly related to Monica that "she's a real sweetie, loves poetry an' all that crap."
 * Wahnee, Mr. - Shelly's father, and owner of Minneapolis South Auto Repair and Restoration, where Shelly works. Passed out when he saw Shel had cut off her long hair. Not much else is known about him, even his first name, although readers got to be surprised by his mother's identity.
 * Wahnee, Mrs. - Shelly's mom (no first name ever given) died of a heart attack when Shelly was ten; help wasn't able to arrive because a drunk had crashed their car into a phone pole earlier, severing the phone lines near Shelly's house. She gave Shelly the figurines that look like the Golem Girls, which really should have been a hint that she might know something about golems, the Calendar Machine, and the Glyph language (she was apparently a museum curator, so she could have had plausible deniability). She had long flowing hair, which was one reason why Shelly cut her hair off when she died. Some things about her identity came out years later, revelations that Shelly and others are still getting used to.
 * Wahnee, Shelly - Musician and Monica's friend. Car mechanic with muscles like a dock crane. Kachina doll keeper, and the owner of a magical silver hammer, courtesy of Phix. Bassist for the band Fermented Banana. A primary cast member.
 * Wapsi Square - A fictional suburb of Minneapolis, Minnesota. The neighborhood is named for the Wapsipinicon River, which Paul Taylor drove across when visiting his then-girlfriend from Des Moines. There's been speculation as to where the suburb would be located in the Twin Cities, with the likeliest site being somewhere in the southwest section of Minneapolis, since Lake Calhoun and the Mall of America are mentioned.
 * Watkins, Daren - The bartender in Monica's favorite bar. Socially intelligent. Former school teacher, an occupation he says helps with his current line of work. Has a soft and tender side, but basically plays the role of confessor and sound board to the rest of the cast.